I’ve been lurking around my favourite blogs for a while now and the other day i was on Anonymum’s blog reading her interview with Evyl and he said something that totally made sense.  Here is what he said

“I made the mistake that many beginning bloggers make and became a total and complete blog whore and was more concerned with not upsetting my readers” 

You can read more of  this interview here

By now you’re probably wondering what I’m on about. So far this is pretty well structured for a rant isnt it? well yes.

About a year ago I had another blog. My orginal one at Blogspot. I didnt have a big readership just a few reallife friends that read it. For that reason I basically said anything that was on my mind. At that point it was McDreamy. However, One of my real life friends asked me not to talk about boys and sex any more as she didnt like it.

So I havent talked about boys and sex in great detail since then.  Yet she has disccused  the waxing of her va-jay-jay on her on blog and HER FATHER  READS IT.

By now its probably really obvious who im talking about.  

However, this so called friend does not stop there at telling me how to  run my blog.

On her last visit here we were talking about a lot of things and  it came about my idea of  how to help the third world. (if you dnt already know its probably best not to ask as she might get angry).  I hadnt even gotten half way through anything, like the first sentence and she  gave me that look. the look that says “omg I cannot beleive you think that. just how retardard are you?”  

Finally after all this.  She tells me I’m too morbid.

So I decide to go somewhere  that i am accepted for who i am and it doesnt matter. Then real life got in the way and I havent been over there much but thats another story.

Back in highschool I would have told her to shove it up her arse so she’d have a reason for walking like she had a carrot up her butt. I dont know if its age or life that  has made me keep quiet this long. however Enough is enough.

I AM SICK OF YOU LOOKING DOWN AT ME AS THOUGH YOU ARE BETTER THAN ME. YOU ARE NOT. 

FROM NOW I ON I AM NOT TAKING ANYONES BULLSHIT. IF YOU DONT LIKE IT. FINE DONT READ THIS AND DONT BE MY FRIEND. I DONT NEED TO BE FRIENDS WITH PEOPLE LIKE YOU.

So in the future if i say something that you dont like, that scares you? well you know what. no one is making you read this, or listen to me so just push the little X button at the top of your browswer and Poof! im gone.

By the way, I dont like horses or hearing about how you wax your bits but do i complain? no because I RESPECT YOUR RIGHTS.

SO FUCK YOU.

Firstly thanks to everyone thats been commenting and asking me when im comming back. I will come back I’m just not sure when. Posibly when everything is how i want  it to be.

And now some thoughts from the Queen…

          I’m alone and thinking

       I cant stop the pain seeping through

         It spills over and I begin to cry 

          I’m too scared to see you 

             I know i have too 

         For once, Its not about me its about you

           I know what is happening to you   

          I cant stop it. I wish i could.

       I would do anything to make it not happen.

          Only the good die young.

Love n hugs

ME.

Taking a break for a while. Still mad.  Writing elsewhere for  the time being. Coz you know, its too morbid.

If you want to know what im up to then you should already know. If you dont know well then I guess its too morbid for you.

Have a lovely day/night/week/month.

Love and hugs

Your Queen.

Well I’m mad at the moment but i’m not going to say anything. Yay i.e is letting me put pics up!

One more…

Right i’m off to go do some writing. Obviously not here though as its too morbid

Love and hugs

Me.

A few nights ago the flatmate mentioned to me that  his older brother and his thing (girlfriend) were going to be staying here for a few nights.  After  I  clarified that it was indeed his real brother and not his emo squeaky voiced stepbrother I Was fine. For all of 10mins when my next question was.. “err..where are they going to sleep?”  They are going to be on our two couches which is ok. As long as they dont have sex on them (why should our guests get to break in our furniture before we do!). 

Next my brain started.. “oh god  I wont be able to fart.. or burp.. shit what if she thinks  I eat too much? what the hell am I going to say to her? I dont know what to say to a girl.. what do girls talk about??? ” OMG… I JUST THOUGHT.. How the hell am I going to go… you know… to the toilet…  I hate going to the toilet when other people are around. The main toliet is next to the flatmates room and if he’s in his room I wont go in to do anything (except for lately coz its too fucken cold to go to the other bathroom).

You will be pleased to know they are only staying one night!  My poor brain is very greatful…

Moving on…

Before the flatmate left work   his (real) family put in orders of cheap stuff  that they wanted as he was going down to visit for a while before he started his new job.   At christmas time his oldest brother and his wife didnt buy ANYONE christmas presents. I know christmas is all about giving not reciveing but fuck it when you’re buying for other people and you dont get anything back you sorta think “what was the point?” . So when  the flatmate mentioned he wasnt going to buy anything for his new nephew  I didnt try and talk him out  of it.

However his mum said that if he was going to be getting cheap stuff he could get stuff for the baby from her. Sweet so I was put in charge of going to the ladies underthings area at work as well as the baby department. We got  shitloads of stuff..   tonnes of slutty underwear (for the bro’ s thing thats comming to stay).   

The flatmate went to stay with his family with a carload of stuff. Seriously you should have seen  his car. He couldnt use his rear-vision mirror and the passengers seat was covered in stuff. That car was loaded. 

Yesterday the flatmate had dinner with his Dad. I dont particularly like his dad much. Sure I smile and all that but I dont like the way he acts and the things I know he’s done. But I cant mention that on here.   Over lunch  his dad mentioned how he was on Trademe  bidding on a particular item when he saw his oldest sons account. So being the nosey dad he is (arent all dads nosey??) he went to investigate.  And there it was pages and pages of baby stuff. Not just double ups of things they might have had. That I wouldnt give two hoots about. But there was stuff that his mum and his Grandmother had knitted for his unborn child and his eldest daughter.   

This  has made me really mad. We got shitloads if stuff for them. If they didnt want it we could have kept it. I have a friend is due to have her baby soon (one very excited aunty right here!) I could have given it to her. We could have sold it on Trademe ourselves.  We put our arses on the line (selling cheap stuff)  for them. And they go and do that. 

Do you wanna know why they’re doing it??   In the words of marilyn manson… “I dont like the drugs, but the Drugs like me” .  Yup.  Drugs. When the flatmate told me that I was  imagining like a  P lab or something but no its just weed.  However in saying “its just weed”  well if you’re having to sell stuff  so you can buy your weed then you’ve got a problem my friend. A real problem. 

The flatmate isnt going to tell his mum coz he knows it’ll make her upset. He is going to tell his brother thats staying with us (hopefully he’ll kick some sense into him). I did ask for permission before I posted this just incase you’re wondering.

Also  the older brother complained that the flatmate didnt go around and see them when he was down there. Um.. hello.. you have a car? you can drive?  you could go too him.  Not to mention that  his sister needed his support at that time.

Well I’m off..

Thanks for listening/reading.

Love n hugs

me.

I’ve had a few idea’s lately. some pretty silly ones and a few good ones.

One of my silly ones (this will make you laugh)…………..

I Was reading the manual for my electric blanket, it said that the controllers are removeable so you can wash it. Cool i thought  I could change the controllers over so i can have the right -side so then i wouldnt hafta sleep funny. Yeah i know  it wouldnt work.

My other idea was.. At my funeral  i’m going to have it organised so all my funeral songs are on  a cd which will be given out to people. Thats a cool idea yes? 

Speaking of funeral songs.  My flatmate and i keep comming up with good songs. Except we both want them. So whats the ettiquite with that?? like can we have the same songs? do we get a 2 for 1 special? how does that work??

For my blog  i was thinking of  having the post title as either the title of a song , or lyrics from a song for a whole month!  but it  has to fit in with the post you know. I couldnt have ” girls just wanna have fun”  and then talk about cars. you know?

anyway its late and im tired.

love n hugs

me

On the weekend I Realised I hadnt had my  period for about 2 months I figured I’d better give myself one so I stoped taking my pill and so far so good.

Yesterday when I Was cleaning up the house I had my ipod going when one of my funeral songs came on and it made me cry!  which I guess is the point of a funeral song but its never made me cry before. I thought yay! must be pms time!!

Then last night I had the most uncomfortable sleep ever!! I  was sleeping away when I woke up with a herd of elephants stampeiding across my uterus  but I pushed them away and got back to sleep. Finally after waking up four times I decided at 4am to take some drugs and good old nurofen gel.  It took forever for the two lots to kick in but once they did I ended up going back to sleep. 

I finally woke up this morning  feeling ok but now OMG the elephants are back! I’ve taken some more drugs but I havent done the nurofen gel again as I have to go into town and I dont want to over drug myself.

Also I saw these new pads on tv a few months back  promising “a peaceful nights sleep being able to sleep how you normally do” . Although I sleep how ever the fuck I Want no matter what time of the month it is they were $3.99 so I thought why not?? But omg they have like four wings!! I dont need to feel like im strapping on some other type of apendage thank you very much Stayfree. I think I’ll stick to libra.

Anyway I thought you would like to know that it is  that time of the month for me and I could REALLY do with a coffee. Odd as I havent wanted coffee for ages and I dont know if I want to have  a coffee today as I’m going out for coffee tomorrow. Hmmm decisions…  I guess it’ll depend on how easy it is to get to starbucks and if I get  Drivers-pms-rage.  Oh speaking of driving …

PETROL IS NOW $1.97 A LITRE! FUCK ME SIDEWAYS PEOPLE. FUCK.ME.  Apparently in china their petrol is subsidised. Why the fuck isnt ours? Because our government puts two tax’s on ours. Thats why.

Right I’m going into town. I’ve got to go see the lovely people at budget waste. OMG the secretary lady rung up yesterday and said “hi I rung up for Scott on saturday and left a message for him to call me back and he hasnt.”  in this totally accusing tone like I didnt give him the message so I said ” yes I gave him the message but he works until 5pm so I dont know if he had time to go see you. Obviously  he didnt.” and then I hung up.

So  Scott went in last night after work and said there were people in the office but the door was locked and they all just stared at him. He was mighty pissed off last night. I  offered to go in  today wearing my catsuit and nunchucks. 

Well this is rather long.

I’m out.

Love n hugs

Queen PMS

Did anyone notice how I didnt ONCE mention the gym or my eating habbits? Yeah I was a lazy bitch. 

This week is going to be different  I’m going to get up early tomorrow, clean my room, make sure the house is tidy.

OMG my flatmate just told me I look like an EMO!! an EMO!! 

Anyway, Lately I’ve noticed that I’m missing taking photographs I’ve got like 4 camera’s  and  one desire to take photographs annnnnd I found this cool site called deviantart. and they have cool pics.  

So my plan for tomorrow is to do all my good shit then I’m going to go for a walk and take some pics. I cant decide if I Want to take a film camera or if I just want to take a digital. On the one hand  the digital would be smaller and I can see what my pics look like. On the other hand I miss the magic of paying $12.95 only to discover that my pictures are blurry and I’ve left my thumb over the hole.  

hmm.. Decisions…  I think I will take most in black and white though. I miss black and white.

I painted my nails tonight,  Dark blue which is why the flatmate is calling me an emo. Atleast… I think thats why…

OMG   I’m watching Final Destination 2 and the scariest scene ever is the scene  in the dentist surgery with the drill and the needle! well not so  much the needle just the drill.  

Well I am going to go watch my flatmate iron and cry in the corner because  the flatmate thinks I’m an emo.

Yours sincerely

Queen Emo. 

I stole this from someone who stole it from someone. Please dont steal it is wrong :p

• Over 21?  *gulp* yes but only by one year!!
• Danced in front of your mirror naked? not nakid but in underwear 
• Ever told a lie?  No we sell quality products here at (insert my place of work)
• Been arrested? Nope!!  ohhh yeah im so good
• Kissed a picture? I will say yes but I will not admit to who. 
• Fallen asleep at work/school? At work yes and at UCOL.. that was funny  
• Held an actual snake?  as opposed to a  trouser snake? no in both cases
• Ever run a red light? Yup but I may have to stop as I’ve heard they’re putting in cameras on the traffic lights but who knows. 
• Ever drink and drive?  I have been drinking and driven but not totally drunk.
• Been suspended from school? Suprisingly no.
• Ever been fired from a job? again no. 
• Been in a fist fight? Yes
• Sang karaoke?  not in public. I Will dance around and sing when no one is home
• Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t?  Yes.
• Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose?  Yes lol 
• Ever gone “under the knife?” Not for like beauty surgery but  for tonsils and teeth. 
• Ever laughed until you wet yourself?  no.
• Ever been dumpster diving?. Um… no 
• Kissed in the rain? Yes   
• Sang in the shower?  No theres a window that  I can hear the neighbors out of so if I can hear them then they may be able to hear me.. 
• Sat on a rooftop?  of a car? yes many years ago. 
• Ever witnessed a crime?  Yup totally. I was at  a supermarket and these guys took some stuff. I would have told someone but there was a supermarket worker  working like right next to them. Dumb arse.
• Thought about your past with regret?  only 3%
• Been pushed in the pool with your clothes on?  no… 
• Skinny dipped?  No
• Had sex in a public place?  Yes. Good times
• Blacked out from drinking?  Well I do have two nights that I dont remember much of..  
• Taken naked pics?  Um…. Yes
• Cried yourself to sleep? Yes
• Fired a gun?  Some sort of gun type thing many years ago.
• Liked someone with nobody else knowing about it?  Hmm.. No…
• Played strip poker? I always seemed to lose even when I thought I Was right.
• Been to a strip joint?  Yup for a date  woohoo!
• Donated Blood?  No I havent.
• Liked someone you shouldn’t?  Totally.  I didnt act (much) on it.   
• Have a tattoo? Not yet. Hope too soon though
• Been to jail?  To visit  yes.
• Have or had any piercings? Bottom ears, top left, tongue and nose. I do want something else but I dont know what.  
• Made out with a complete stranger? Nope  
• Had a one night stand?  Nope.
• Caught someone cheating on you? Nope.
• Mooned/Flashed someone?  Yup lol  
• Been to a rodeo?  lol omg my work mate was going  today “do you know how to rodeo?” and she was doing some funky dance thing.  This question reminded me of that. But no I havent. 
• Been to a NASCAR race? No but I’ve been to stockcars.
• Been in Love? Hmmm… I think I’ve been more in love with the idea of being in love rather than actually being in love with the person.
• Met a celebrity? Yes I met Peter Brock and Mark stevens  and  I did meet the guys from evermore but that was many years ago before they were famous.
• Been on TV?  Possably on the trackracing/greyhound channel my family has lots to do with those skinny dog things  so I go to the big races n shit.  woo. I’m not too bad at picking winners either. oh speaking of wining remind me to buy a lotto ticket tomorow please.
• Know how to cook?  I think I’m better at baking rather than cooking 
• Slept outdoors?  Yes in a tent.
• Spent the night in a snow cave? No I’ve never been around snow long enough.
• Slept with someone knowing you didn’t like them? It wasnt that I didnt like him I just knew it wasnt right. 
• Smoked? Yes I have. Glad you didnt ask what 
• Ever done drugs? Ahh arent you clever…  Yes. 
• Thought you were going to drown?  Yes. Actually lets share a story with you. There was one time (at band camp)    I was a wee young’un  early in the morning going potty when I saw a daddy longlegs comming for me  I jumped and squealed and fell into the loo and thought the toliet was going to suck me  out to where my uncle works (sewage treatment plant).  So it wasnt drowning exactly but there was water.
• Play an instrument? mm.. I played the drums years ago. I can do a few simple things on the piano but dont expect mozart.
• Bungee jumped, skydived, based jumped, etc?  I have jumped on a trampoline and thts it.

Ohhh we’re done!! 

I was reading blogs this morning munching on my cereal (is it just me  or do you guys get sick of continuously chewing and crunching too?)  I clicked on Valleygirl and it come up ” blog not found” EEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKK!!  shes like my favourite  blog to read! (err.. besides my friends).

I hope shes ok. 

Well must tootle off to the shower its fucken cold!! 

Love n hugs

me